Every college student during the spring semester faces a similar dilemma: stay on campus for the summer or return home. For most students, returning home is the most practical, whether due to financial reasons, summer employment, or to be with family and friends. 

While this decision may seem simple, people disregard the psychological readjustment that sometimes comes with transitioning from college to a family household. Returning home can cause students to step into an older version of themselves that no longer matches them. 

For those with disabilities, members of the LGBTQ+, or anyone who has built a strong sense of identity and community at college, going back home can feel like a breach. 

Reasons for Going Home for the Summer

1. Financial Situations
   
   • College is expensive, and staying on campus for the summer means spending more on housing, utilities, and groceries. Especially without the support of financial aid, paying these expenses can be extremely difficult. Returning home offers free housing and access to reasonable and lower costs, which can provide a chance to save money for the upcoming semester. 
2. Summer Employment
   
   • On-campus jobs often pause during the summer, so students return to a previous summer job or find a new job through local connections. Some colleges are also located in small and rural areas that do not offer as many professional opportunities as their home cities.
3. Social Ties
   
   • Returning home for some college students is an opportunity to reconnect with high school friends or spend time with their family. Those who may not have felt the best support or be homesick find comfort in seeing friends from the past. Returning home allows them to spend time with loved ones without missing school or critical social events at college. 

Emotional Turmoil of Returning Home

The shift from college to home life can leave students stuck between two different lives, such that the familiar may feel foreign and not appealing as it once had been. 

• Loss of Independence
  
  • College allows individuals to live a new life, where they can decide their schedule, what to eat, and explore their identity. Returning home, the independence shrinks overnight. These students who used to have free rein are now asked to follow house rules and do chores. This change can make students feel suffocated, especially when living at home for longer. 
• Social Disconnection
  
  • The social environment in college is brand new and filled with peers of their age, allowing students to create spontaneous and meaningful connections. So when returning home, college students can feel isolated, especially for those who may not have had the best experience in high school. This sense of disconnection can be especially difficult for those whose identity was affirmed more in college spaces than in their hometown. 
• Change Identity
  
  • College is not only about academics but also self-discovery. Many values, habits, interests, and worldviews can change at college. However, home remains the same, which can create a mismatch that forces college students to suppress certain parts of themselves that are new to their family. This disconnection can create internal tension, making them feel out of place. This can be particularly challenging for students who identify with the LGBTQ+ community or who have embraced their identity as a person with a disability at college. However, when they return home, their families may not fully understand or accept them for their newly grown identity. The feeling of being “half-accepted” or misunderstood by those who loved them their whole lives can be emotionally scarring and lead to the development of anxiety or depression.  

Addressing Challenges 

There are strategies that college students can use for their time at home during summer to be more meaningful and enjoyable, such that they can be more truly themselves with independence.

1. Create Boundaries and Communication
   
   1. One of the most potent things college students can do is communicate with their families regarding how college has changed their habits, such as privacy, sleep schedule, and hobbies. Doing this avoids any surprises for the parents and prevents any misunderstandings. This can initially feel awkward, but setting boundaries will help the students and parents. Also, remember, just as college students change, their family have been living their own lives, so mutual respect is very powerful in setting the boundaries. 
2. Staying Connected
   
   1. To maintain their identity and mental health, college students can remain in touch with their friends from college through texting regularly and FaceTime. Remaining in touch can remind students that they are still connected to a community that understands them. Students can visit their friends’ hometowns during the summer to keep that sense of community alive, if possible. 
3. Building a Routine
   
   1. For many people, including me, being at home can be a trap where they fall into past unhealthy habits, such as staying up super late or isolating themselves in their bedroom. However, creating a routine that mirrors the college independence, such as going to the gym, volunteering, and doing hobbies, allows them to maintain a healthy sense of self.  Creating a strong structure can help students stay grounded in who they are becoming instead of reverting to the past. 

Conclusion

The transition from college to home is more than just switching beds and addresses; it is a psychological shift that can be challenging, especially for their identity and independence. However, the fact is that people are allowed to change, even if the spaces around them have not. 

These emotions and solutions apply not only to college students. Anybody who has ever left a place to grow and returned somewhere in the past that was unchanged can relate to these problems. 

We all may carry pieces of who we once were, but they are not the entire picture. Who you are now is a more complete and evolved puzzle. 

Thanks for reading this blog post, and stay tuned for my final blog post (so sad!), sharing a little personal story about myself.